Silent Lovers

This poem series is about a guy in love. He starts the story sorta in denial. Refusing to truly admit what he feels. In the beginning he touches on what he feels, but as you progress within the series you start to touch on the feelings he originally left out.

1. Silent Glances
2. Conversations
3. Acceptance
4. High Horse

High Horse

I was at the top of my game

riding the waves of my high horse

she came round and knocked me down, my troubled dame

broke and snatched took everything, a unrelenting force

Maybe that’s why on my way down, I fell for her

unlike others she didn’t ask of me, she demanded of me

becoming a constant force after and so I hopped to her beat

Thus this went on for a while now

me the blind fool, her truly ignorant of her power

Maybe she chose it or maybe she honestly never knew

but I only shook free of her shackles at my darkest hour

Because she loved another . . . I think

see I confused her, scared her, made her flee

so she was gone in a blink

I loved the pain she brought me

Praying to God during the day, Lucifer at night

all for the hopes to make her mine

but I was tool ate, my prayers unanswered, a silent night

for in her reply confusion I find

and still I wait

because my horse’s career is dead, Bojack

and this wait, this wait I hate

because if on that day I had the guts to act she’ll be mine . . .

yep that’s a fact

Acceptance

As we talk I watch her

see her mouth move but eyes tell a different tale

hearing the once was, the used to be’s, how things were

my job is to listen, I can’t fail

Her eyes speak of a great sadness, The Grand Canyon

combined with such beauty, my cold mistress

to warm her heart is my errand

but to wish this is folly, foolish, the thought keeps me reckless

But she won’t let me in

maybe she’s Pandora’s box locked

fuck it, I’ll peek through the keyhole to climb in to win

cuz I know for me, there be more to see

I’m simply left assuming these things

for darkness whispers into my lover’s ears

in my life a frosty tone she brings

still I love her and that she fears

they ask me why her, they tell me to move on

that I’ll never thaw what is completely chilled

cuz I know deep down she lies

she’s not a man shot deep by a gun

for there’s still much to build

I’m a love struck-fool

lost to quite frankly the idea of us

Conversations

Conversations ever changing

the flow of seasons

as summer becomes autumn, leaves continuously falling

the words pause without reason

so I ask why

you went from telling me everything

from me seeing you cry

to nothing . . .

like rain through a roof, you slipped

through the cracks, vanished

losing you I lost myself, pieces you ripped

but like a magic trick you’ll turn up earnest

and so you played this game

tear me up each time

a constant pain

against you I built walls, a steel line

only to watch it bend and break

you . . . my only weakness

a repeated cycle, my often mistake

but while I love I have felt pain and hopelessness

because to have hope

is to expect a difference unlikely

to wish for the need to no longer cope

cuz you’ll never be mine and that was likely

Silent Glances

Silence shakes the room

The words slice the air, silence breaks

she walks in the room

heads turn and jealous smiles are faked

I catch her eye

and receive a grin

she gives a warm gaze, a silent conversation we have none the wise

but there’s a reason why I’m only a friend

there’s another I know

before the words leave her mouth

So I put on a show

believable, I doubt

Cuz I know she’s settled for less

given more than she should

damn its a mess

because I found myself falling deeper than I thought I could

For her sake or for my own

I must stay away, never return

a clean break, destroyed bone

our communication adjourned

I for if this fails, it would be a waste

for me to run and try to escape

only to return and continue the chase